Oh brother. It has been FOR-EV-ER since I posted over here.
Do you guys even remember me? Is anyone still popping in over here from time to time?
HULLOoooo……Is anybody out there?!
{crickets}
Well, for the tens of readers who visit this blog I’ve got a LOT to catch you up on. Put on a fresh pot of coffee y’all. And you might want to be sitting for this one.
Remember when we lost our dear, beloved family dog, Daphne and had to move unexpectedly back to Georgia….in a hurry….in a major ice storm….into an apartment….and give away our chickens and abandon our garden plot once again….and reevaluate our life plans?
And remember when I told you we were adding to our family a Newfoundland puppy?
Ok, good, we’re all up to speed.
We brought home that Newfoundland puppy and we named her Rosie. She is a giant and growing every second of the day.
But let’s back up and tell all the parts in between that you DON’T know.
Rewind to June 2014. I was a couple of days late so I took a pregnancy test and got this:
Please note the date, June 2nd.
Obviously the pregnancy never progressed and I miscarried two weeks after getting that positive result. It was fairly low-key and not my first rodeo in the miscarriage department so that’s why you’re only hearing of it now. It was early, nature handled everything without medical intervention, and I bounced back fairly quickly. We were sad, but again, we had experienced this before and felt at peace with it all after a grieving period.
Fast forward through all the job loss, family pet loss, chicken/farm loss, ice storms and stress to May 29th, 2015. We had waited several exciting weeks to pick up our sweet puppy. We made the 4 hour drive to get her and we were all so very excited. She was the fluffiest, snuggliest thing and we were all on a puppy breath high the whole ride home.
Fast forward through a few sleepless nights (because having a puppy is pretty much like having a newborn). I was a few days late but I half chalked it up to being stressed from not getting enough sleep the last few days. But since I had a test on hand I decided to take it one morning before Mr. Thistle left for work. And, wouldn’t you know, it was positive.
I laughed at the timing and went to show him and we both nervous laughed because, news flash, WE JUST BOUGHT A GIANT BABY DOG! (For those of you wondering, her mother is 150 lbs and her father is 180 lbs. And she’ll be her full grown weight at a year old but won’t “mature” mentally until 3 years of age. So a GIANT BABY DOG is the best descriptor of a Newfoundland before the age of 3).
The timing of it all was laughable. We are in a holding pattern, so to speak, in this apartment and we just got settled from a big move (again) and we were getting back on track with homeschool and had just took on the monumental (pun intended) task of training a giant baby dog.
Sure. Tiny baby, apartment, giant baby dog. Seems about right.
But the real highlight of this story is the date. The very specific date that I nonchalantly took a pregnancy test. Please note the date on this picture:
June 2nd, y’all.
June-freakin-2nd. I found out I was pregnant again one year to the day!
Now, let me say this: Miscarriage is a HIGHLY sensitive and personal subject. Everyone deals with it in their own way and the physical and mental aspects can change each time. It is a hard thing and I am in no way diminishing the process. But the way I cope is to be very pragmatic about it all. I got very caught up in the “why” and all the answers I wanted from God about it all the first time it happened. It did not lead me to a good place. So I stick to the science of it all now and I do not try to figure it out or reason it in any way other than being very matter of fact about it. That’s hard for some people, including my husband, sometimes. I’m not sure it’s the most popular way of handling it but it’s how I go about it.
HOWEVER, there are times when it is just HARD for me to ignore the “whats going on here, God?” questions. The very precise timing of this pregnancy feels like there’s something big in the background of it all. Couple that with the fact that it is, by earthly standards, rather inconvenient timing, and you’ve got yourself the makings of a very, very odd and interesting coincidence. You can’t know the very intimate details of my prayer life or spiritual walk, obviously, but let me just say this pregnancy has really kicked up the interesting factor a notch or two. I am amazed and astounded by the very delicate process that is unfolding in our lives over here.
So, here we are.
We’ve seen the heartbeat on ultrasound several times and everything looks good and I am just nearing the end of the exhausting first trimester. I’ve had several panic attacks alongside joy and amazement over it all. It’s all been very manic. Yay for pregnancy hormones! I’m not quite sure where to put it all, mentally and emotionally. That’s one reason why I haven’t been blogging. That and the nausea and fatigue.
In February the Mandins will be a party of five + one giant baby dog + one cat.
Hold on to your hats folks. It just got real up in here.
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